Optical Fun: Les Miser-Eyes (“Les Miserables” Parody)

In this huge Broadway undertaking, Dr. May and Dr. Martin team up with the doctors and staff of Johnson Optometric Associates to perform “Les Miser-Eyes.” Performing a cappella parodies of “Look Down,” “Red and Black,” “Master of the House,” “On My Own,” “A Little Fall of Rain,” “I Dreamed a Dream,” “Bring Him Home,” “Empty Chairs at Empty Tables,” One Day More,” and “Do You Hear the People Sing” from Les Misérables, one of the most famous and most performed musicals worldwide. Dr. May & Dr. Martin are huge fans…

Les Miser-Eyes Medley (lyrics by Andrew May & Barrett Martin):

Sit down, sit down, it’s time for your exam
Sit down, sit down, your doctor is the man

Now Chart 24601, your year is up and your exam’s begun
You know what that means? Yes, it means I’ll see
Follow to the letter our instructions for you, clean your contacts and use your drops too
Yes 24601, my name is HIPAA protected
And I am Dr. May, and I’m Dr. Martin, do not forget us, 24601

Sit down, sit down, it’s time for your exam
Sit down, sit down, your doctor is the man

We need a sign, a way to keep track, and keep the doctors in line…
Green, this patient should be next
Gray, here for a full exam
Blue, this is an office check
Red, their eyes are dilating
White, the tech is in the room
Black, the doctor is the man

Master of the House
Masters of the house, keepers of the zoo
Trying to keep an eye out on the front desk too
Here a tech is sick, dealing with complaints
Knowing that it’s not our fault because we’re saints
But when it comes checking eyeballs, there are lots of tricks we knows
But with all the changes Obama Care will keep us on our toes

On My Own
On my own pretending the doctor’s beside me
All alone I’ve been waiting for over an hour
I need him to prescribe me glasses
Because the world around me is so blurry as it passes
Driving at night the headlights glare like haloes
I can’t see, I just stay near the midline
My mother had cataracts at my age
And now I see this poster and I think I have them too

A Little Yellow Drop
Don’t you fret, merci, my patient, you won’t feel any pain
A little yellow drop, can hardly leave a stain
I’m here, that’s all you need to know
And I’ll check your IOP, yes, you can trust in me
Your eye pressure is only 14

I Had a Patient
I had a patient not long ago, he came to me with decreased vision
I found he had a macular hole, so I sent him to a retinal surgeon

He spent a week facing down, it filled his days with endless boredom
But the macular hole healed, and once again he could see

I had a patient with a macular hole, but now he’s seeing 20/20
He couldn’t even see the Big “E,” now vision has come to the patient I’d seen

Dr. Bob
Dr. Bob, heal my eye
It’s a hair, it’s not always been there
It’s driving me mad, scratching me
Dr. Bob, set me free

Look Down
Look down, look down, there’s something in your eye
Look down, look down, cause this may make you cry

At the End of the Day
At the end of the day we’re another day older
Spinning the dials puts a crick in your neck
And the lenses that we hold get heavier every day
But we’re lucky to be Dr. Martin and Dr. May
And we’re counting our blessings

Do You Hear the People Sing?
Did you know that you are done? Let us walk you to the front
This is the sound you may not hear until next year’s exam’s begun
Did you have a pleasant time? Did you get a thorough exam?
This is the song we sing to wait til tomorrow comes!

Will you join in our parade as we take you to the check-out?
Walking down the halls is so much fun so give us your best shout
We’re grateful you came to JOA today!

Did you know that you are done? Let us walk you to the front
This is our way to celebrate, now sing together everyone
When the vision in your eyes, echoes the love that’s in our hearts
Oh we hope to feel this way when tomorrow comes


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